The Corrs Terrorize America Again

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The Corrs Terrorize America.... AGAIN
The Airport
The Corrs make a landing at JFK International Airport sometime during the afternoon. Since it would be nighttime in Ireland, they're tuckered out, except for Jim, who's a party animal.
Andrea: I can sooooo barely walk right now.
Sharon: You're telling me.
Caro: Pretty soon I'm gonna start sucking MY thumb.
Andrea: No.... my trademark move!
Jim is many feet ahead of his sisters, holding a coffee and being wide awake.
Jim: I loved our last trip here, don't you?
Andrea: If I could remember it through the haze in my head, then perhaps I'd agree.
Sharon: There's always haze in your head, Andrea.
Caro: Yeah, a thick blue fog.
Andrea: Hmm, I love you both too.
They go to baggage claim and get their bags. It's very crowded and the Corrs get split up. Sharon and Caroline are on their own, Jim is on his own, and Andrea is on her own. Andrea can barely see what's going on.
Jim: Andrea? Caroline?
He doesn't get an answer from the people crowding around the luggage carousel. He sees a familiar group of bags with their names on them, so he starts pulling them off.
Sharon: Where the hell did Jim and Andrea go?
Caro: You got me. I can't find anyone in here. I'm pretty sure if Andrea's lost she'll stay lost.
Andrea manages to find her way to the carousel and looks for Jim. She sees a guy in a leather jacket near her and taps him on the shoulder.
Andrea: Jim...
The guy turns around.
Andrea: Oh never mind, you're not him.
Guy: No... but I could be, little girl.
Andrea: Ah, no. *disappears into the crowd again*
Sharon: Jim! There you are.
They go to Jim, who's pulling more bags off the carousel.
Jim: Oh hey. Good thing you found me.
Caro: Yah, except we can't find Andrea.
Jim: Typical, eh? Sharon, go find us a luggage cart, will you? Then we can just wheel this stuff out of here.
Sharon: Alright.
Sharon leaves while Caro helps take bags off the carousel.
Jim: Actually, you should look for Andrea. I don't want her getting lost and holding us up.
Caro: Okay then.
Caroline goes to search for Andrea in the crowd of people, which is thinning slightly.
Andrea is hiding. She sees someone who looks like Jim but doesn't want to risk it. She sees Sharon walking in the other direction.
Andrea: Sharon!! Sharon!!
Sharon doesn't hear her and continues to walk away. Andrea makes a desperate move and shoves her way through people, landing at Sharon's feet.
Sharon: Huh. Tired, are we?
Andrea: *getting to her feet* I was lost. I couldn't find you, I was scared.
Sharon: Hmm, well, you can help me with a luggage cart.
Andrea: Good. I don't want to get kidnapped.
Caroline keeps searching through the crowd?
Caro: Andrea? Andrea?
Now Caroline's lost.
Sharon and Andrea see a luggage cart not far away and go toward it. Suddenly someone grabs that one.
Sharon: Damn. Wait, there's one over there.
They head toward that one but it too gets taken.
Andrea: Damn! Oh wait, there's one. Quick!
They dash for the luggage cart and grab hold of it just as a big fat lady with an annoyingly big hat grabs onto it.
Sharon: It's ours!
Fat Lady: No it's not!
Andrea: Yes it is! We saw it first!
Fat Lady: No you didn't! This one's mine!
The fat lady jerks the cart, almost wrenching it from the grip of Sharon and Andrea.
Sharon: Let go of the cart! It's ours!
Andrea: Yah!
They jerk it back toward them. The fat lady grabs onto it with both hands and shakes it around.
Fat Lady: Let go of the cart! Let go of the cart!
Sharon: Rrrrggggh FINE!
Sharon lets go of the cart, sending the fat lady falling backwards and hitting the floor.
Fat Lady: Oh, oh! Help me! Help me!
Sharon: Em, we'd better run.
Andrea: There's a cart. And it's free! Let's go!
Andrea runs to an empty cart and jumps in, claiming it. Sharon runs up and pushes it away in a hurry.
Andrea and Sharon rush back to the luggage carousel and find Jim.
Jim: Good, you're back. Hey Andrea, I sent Caroline to look for you.
Andrea: Well where is she now? *climbs out of cart*
Jim: I don't know.
Andrea looks around the crowd to see if she can find Caroline. She walks away leaving Sharon and Jim alone.
Jim: Oh well... they'll find us. Let's load this crap and get out of here.
Andrea makes her way through the crowd again, looking for Caroline. She sees Caroline's hair moving in one direction and follows it. Just as she does, someone grabs her arm.
Andrea: Hey! Quit it!
Andrea smacks the arm and sees that it's the same creepy man from earlier.
Andrea: Leave me alone!
Man: Just come with me. I just want to talk. Then I'll let you go to your mommy and daddy.
Andrea: You're really not stable, are you?
Andrea gets away and catches up with Caroline.
Caro: Oh, there you are. I've been looking everywhere for you.
Andrea: So have I. Listen, we need to get out of here. We need to get out of here NOW.
Caro: Okay, okay. Let's go find Sharon and Jim.
They go to Sharon and Jim, who have all the bags loaded.
Jim: Ready? Put your carry-ons on here.
Jim's sisters put their carry-on baggage on and wheel the cart away.
Andrea: I think some pedofile or something like that was trying to kidnap me.
Jim: Really? What did he look like? We should call the police.
Andrea: Well he was wearing a jacket like yours and he was kinda tall.
Sharon: Hehehe.
Andrea: Shut up! It's not my fault I'm so short! Anyway, he was thin and lanky.
Jim: Okay. Too bad we don't have bodyguards.
Caro: We don't?
Jim: We're on vacation. And even if we weren't...
Sharon: Every Corr for herself. Hehe.
The Corrs go to the car rental section of the airport and rent a black Mercedes, the same kind from MIB 2.
Sharon: Make sure we ALL get a claim ticket this time, Jim.
Jim: Right, right.
They then go out to the parking lot, and after half an hour they find their car. They begin loading the baggage into the rear.
Andrea: I'm about to drop from exhaustion here.
Caro: So am I. I'd better get my pillow from the luggage.
Andrea: Lucky!
Andrea looks and sees someone lurking by one of the pillars in the parking garage. She squeezes up to the car.
Caro: You really like this car, don't you, Andrea?
Andrea: Em... it's a Mercedes.
Caro: I know, but you look like you're trying to make love to it.
Andrea jumps back from the car.
Andrea: Aggh! Never mind... I'm too tired.
Caroline enjoys her joke further.
Caro: Oh door handle! Oh!! Yes! Yes! *bop*
Jim opens the doors and they all climb in. Andrea practically jumps in and nestles against the other door.
Caro: Jumpy much?
Andrea: I just don't want some crazy stalker guy to kidnap me.
*knock knock knock*
Andrea: AGGH!!
Andrea looks out her window expecting the worst, but it's a security guard. She lets out a breath.
Guard: Do you need me to have this taken back to the terminal, sir?
Jim: Sure, officer. Thanks a lot.
The guard takes the cart away, and Jim gets in.
Sharon: So, what's our first stop?
Jim: Disneyland!!!
Sharon: Disneyland? That's all the way in California!
Jim: Well then... road trip time! Woohooo!
Caro: Jim, you're not American and this isn't college.
Jim: Humor me. This'll be fun.
Andrea: Wake me when we get back to Ireland.
They pull out of the parking space, and Andrea stares dully out the window. She notices another car driving slowly by, a familiar face staring at her. She shivers and locks the door quickly.
Sharon: Are you sure you don't want to stop somewhere here in New York? There has to be something you'd want to see.
Jim: I'm sure everything's closed because of terrorists. Besides, we've been up and down this city many times.
They drive on, Jim getting onto a freeway and heading West.
Caro: OHHHHHHH.... 99 bottles of Guinness on the wall, 99 bottles of Guinness, you take one down and pass it around...
Caroline sees Sharon glaring at her.
Caro: Hum hum dum dum... *quiets down*
Andrea: Look at the pony...
Sharon: Uh oh, Andrea's doing her sleep-talking again.
Jim: *singing* I hear the secrets that you keep...
Caro and Sharon: *singing* When you're talking in your sleep.
Andrea wakes up.
Andrea: Stoppitttttt.....
Caro: Waaaaaaaa, I'm bein' a bayyybeeee. Waaaaaa. *Bop* Oh, lethal.
Sharon: Well, I'm going to read this map and plot some of this trip.
Jim: Why?
Sharon: Because if we spent this whole trip just to go to Disneyland, I'm going to go mad.
Jim: You ARE mad.
Sharon: I'll ignore that, thank you.
Sharon turns on a light and pulls out a large Atlas book. She opens it and starts flipping through.
Sharon: We should go to Disneyworld. It's closer. And it's bigger.
Jim: That's not what I heard. At least, I heard it's not as good as Disneyland.
Sharon: Fine then, we can stop in Nashville for the music museums.
Jim: Ooh, country music. Not.
Sharon: Would you agree with me for once? This is hard, there's so much... junk... in America to look at.
Jim: Yah, find the place with the cucumber museum.
Sharon sighs heavily and continues to read the map.
Sharon: Mardi Gras!
Jim: Eh?
Sharon: We can stop in New Orleans for Mardi Gras!
Jim: When the hell is Mardi Gras anyway?
Sharon: I don't know, but isn't every day Mardi Gras in some places down there?
Jim: Ooh, totally. And I can get my voodoo doll.
Sharon: Oh, hush. New Orleans it is.
Jim: Fine, fine, it's not like I'm driving or anything.

Everyone except for Jim falls asleep, and Jim is left with his thoughts as he drives along the highway (dual carrageway for some of you foreigners). It gets deserted on the road and pretty soon Jim is bored off his arse. The coffee is no longer keeping him perky.
Jim: Radio...
Jim turns on the radio and tunes in some classic rock.
Jim: *singing* Roxxxxxxanne.....
Andrea: Shut up!
Jim laughs and continues to listen, driving along. Andrea and Caroline are piled up in the back seat, with Sharon staring dully out the passenger window.
Getting an evil thought, Jim turns down the radio slowly, times it, then turns it up and screams at the top of his lungs.
Jim: ROXXXXXXANNNNNNE!!!!!!!!!
Caroline nearly flies out the rear window. Sharon jumps up, gasping, while Andrea nearly climbs into her duffle bag.
Sharon: James Steven Ignatius Corr, if you don't turn that off, I'm going to do something NOT NICE!!!!!!
Jim turns the radio off, chuckling.
Jim: Ohhhhhh I needed that. Hahahaha.
Caro: I know what you need. *BOP*
Caroline puts her shoe back on and lies down.
A while later, Andrea wakes up, blinking. It's still night out, with a pale moon lighting the sky. The car is still driving along smoothly.
Andrea: *yawn* Jim, where are we?
Jim doesn't answer her.
Andrea: Jim? Jiimmmm....
She finds that Jim is asleep, but his hands are still on the steering wheel.
And in the distance, the lights of a semi-truck are getting closer and closer.
Andrea: Jim! Jim! Wake up!!!!
Jim doesn't hear her, being sound asleep. Nobody else hears her.
Andrea: Caroline! *shakes her*
Caro: Go away... *snore*
Andrea punches Caroline, who gets pissed.
Caro: Damn, Frank. Fine, I'll get the bread, jerk. *sits up*
Andrea: Caroline! We're all gonna die!!
Caro: Huh?
The lights are getting bigger, and the truck's horn can be heard in the distance.
Andrea: Jim! You stupid lug! Wake up! *slaps him*
Jim barely stirs. Sharon begins to wake up from all the noise.
Sharon: Whuh... huh?
Andrea: We're all gonna die!!
Sharon looks out the windshield and suddenly her eyes are wide.
Sharon: Aggggh!!!!!!
Andrea: Don't just sit there!!
Andrea takes off her seat belt and reaches over. She wrenches Jim's hands off the steering wheel and turns the wheel sharply. The car spins out, tires screeching. Other cars on the road honk their horns and dodge their car as it zooms out of control.
Luckily, the car stops in someone's driveway. Andrea is breathing heavily and lets go of the wheel. That's when Jim decides to wake up.
Jim: Okay mom okay, stop shaking the bed.
Ten minutes later...
Sharon is behind the wheel, trying to calm down. Caroline is in the passenger seat, while Andrea has the whole back seat to herself.
And Jim is asleep in the trunk.
Later, the Corrs are able to find a hotel and stay the night. Four very tired people march around like zombies to the front desk.
Clerk: Uh... may I help you?
Jim looks at her with a black eye and a really tired expression.
Jim: We need two rooms.
Caro: Three!
Andrea: Four!
Jim: Right, two hundred and thirty four.
The clerk gives him a funny look.
Clerk: Um, okay, four rooms, right?
Jim: Yes, whatever you said, pretty teenager lady.
She blushes.
Clerk: How will you be paying?
Jim: With money.
Clerk: Right. Cash or check?
Jim opens up a briefcase and takes out some cash.
Jim: Do you accept these here?
Clerk: Um, yes we do. That will be forty dollars per room, per night.
Jim: So let's see, that's... forty... eighty... uh...
Clerk: *sigh* Um, maybe we'll just sort this out later. Here, rooms 222 through 225.
She hands Jim a bunch of key cards, and they don't even bother to choose, each Corr just takes a card and stomps away.
Clerk: Weird Irish people. Sheesh.
Several days later, The Corrs arrive in a very pretty, very humid and very hot New Orleans, Louisiana.
Jim: Looks lively. Check out the street musicians.
Caro: I remember when we were street musicians.
Jim pulls the car beside a sidewalk and rolls down the windows.
Andrea: Damn! It's hot down here!
Sharon: You're telling me. It was better with the windows up.
Jim: Excuse me, miss!
Jim flags down a woman walking down the street.
Jim: When's Mardi Gras?
Girl: Uh, that was like, back in March.
Sharon: Duhhhhh...
Jim: Em, okay, thank ya.
Caro: Well Jim, now that you dragged us down here and found out nothing's going on, what next?
Jim: Hmm, what's on the map, Sharon?
Sharon: Oh, leave everything to me, is it? Roll up the windows and get us out of here.
Jim gets the car back to the highway, driving out of New Orleans.
Andrea: Jim, that was several hours of my life wasted that I'll never get back.
Jim: Sorry. I didn't remember when Mardi Gras was.
Andrea: Hmmph. Caroline, give me my coloring book.
Caroline is coloring away.
Caro: No, it's fun! I'm bored too!
Andrea: Well you can color in it with me. Just give it back.
Caro: No!
Andrea: Yes! Give it back!
Caro: No!
Andrea: Jiiiiiim! Caroline won't give me my coloring boooook!
Jim: Don't make me come back there! Caroline, give Andrea her book.
Caroline gives it back to Andrea and sticks her tongue out.
Caro: Nuhhhh
Andrea: Nuhhhh yourself.
Sharon goes through the atlas again.
Sharon: Grand Canyon?
Jim: Hmm, how about it? Andrea? Caroline?
Andrea: How about on the way back?
Caro: Yeah, on the way back.
Sharon sighs.
Sharon: How about Houston Space Museum?
Caro: How about no?
Sharon: Hey, I'm the one with the map.
Caro: So? I'm the one with the brain.
Sharon: Hmmph! Fine, we'll just drive alllll the way to Disneyland then.
Hours later...
Andrea: *bored* Who's got their feet stuck in the air?
Caro: It's me, it's me.
Andrea: Who's got a rabbit in her hair?
Caro: It's me, it's me.
Caro and Andrea are extremely bored, having colored in the coloring book on all pages, front and back, even on the covers.
Andrea: Who wants a big giant ice cream now?
Caro: It's me, it's me.
Andrea: Who wants to eat it on a cow?
Caro: It's me, it's me.
Sharon whines and looks out the window. Jim turns on the radio and tunes it to really cheesy Pop music.
Sharon: I knew I loved you before I met you... I think I dreamed you into life. I knew I loved you before I met you... I have been waiting all my life...
Then Jim busts out.
Jim: Ooooooooh HOOOOOO ooooooo.... HAAAAA HAAAAAA EE-YAhhhhhhh EEyahhhhhh...
Sharon: *laughing* A thousand angels dance around you...
Andrea: Somebody please throw me out of the car.
Caro: Here, let me help.
Andrea: Uh, no.
The Corrs later stop at a Shopping Mall...