The Walgreens Store
Andrea: When are we going to eat? I'm hungry and I'm TIRED.
Sharon: Just wait. Jim needs some Blistex.
Caroline: Hey look! Band Aids!
Andrea: Hmm, maybe those'll help heal that cut on your neck. Oh wait,
that's your head.
Caro: Hey!
Andrea: Just kidding!
(Sharon picks up a bottle of dis-infectant)
Sharon: Maybe this'll help clear up that problem with your face, Andrea.
Andrea: What? My face doesn't need fixing! (smiles big)
Sharon: True, it's beyond repair (puts bottle back and laughs.)
(Andrea eyes some junk food in the corner.)
Andrea: I need SOMETHING (saying to herself.)
Jim: Hey everyone. (Walks up with mirror shades, a new t-shirt that
says "Frankie say RELAX", and a box of condoms.)
(The girls crack up.)
Sharon: What are you supposed to be, my ex-boyfriend?
Caroline: You mean mine.
Andrea: Mine!
All 3: Are you trying to look like my ex-boyfriend?
(Jim looks at himself wondering what's wrong.)
Jim: What? Don't you like the shirt?
Sharon: What happened to your leather pants and jacket. And the OTHER
shirt?
Jim: I want to look laid back, we're in America again and it's hot
here.
Caroline: Well, the shirt is okay, but I think you forgot to include
some NEW pants in your little fashion statement.
(Jim looks and sees that he's just there in his boxers. Walks away
quickly, turning red.)
Sharon: Silly man. What a brother.
(Caro and Sharon hear crunching, turn around to see Andrea gorging
on a bag of pretzels.)
Caro: What are you doing, Andy?
Andrea: I can't help it, I'm HUNGRY! I haven't eaten all day.
Sharon: Maybe if you hadn't slept when we went to the Weinerschnitzel.
Caro: Yeah, and you were hugging me and calling me "puppy", Andy, the
whole way there.
Andrea: Um... I don't know... (crunch crunch)
(Sharon takes a hat with an 8 ball on it and puts it on Andy's head.
Andy shrugs, and keeps munching.)
Caro: Oh dear...
Sharon: What?
Caro: We're out of tampons.
Sharon: Ok, let's go get some. Andy, stay here.
(Andy doesn't care, just keeps digging in the bag for more.)
A stock boy walks into the aisle, sees Andrea standing there with a
bag of pretzels, an 8 ball cap, and looking very tired, drops his box of
Tampax and gets all googly-eyed.
(Sharon and Caro walk back.)
Sharon: There isn't any!
Caro: Oh wait, here we go.
(The stock boy goes further into shock as they go through the box.)
Caro: What's his problem?
(Andrea shrugs dully and grabs a bag of Cheetos.)
(Jim walks in, wearing his leather pants and jacket, but wearing a
new shirt that says "Don't GET with MY sister." The stock boy is practicing
his vowels.)
Jim: Okay, are we ready here?
(Caro and Sharon have 2 boxes each. Both say yes.)
Jim: What's wrong with that guy?
Sharon: I don't know. He's just been spazzing out over there.
(Jim walks up and taps the guy on the shoulder. Guy falls over.)
Jim: I dunno. Let's pay for this stuff.
(They're at the check-out counter now, the female cashier is almost
too excited to see Jim and can barely type on her computer.)
Jim: Okay, um, I'm buying this shirt, and this Blistex, and these sunglasses.
Cashier: Okay...
Jim: Oh yeah, and these condoms.
Cashier: Eek! Um I mean okay!
Sharon: As if he has anywhere to use them. *winks at her sisters*
(Sharon and Caro put the boxes of Tampax on the counter and step aside.
Andrea walks up, with 8 ball cap and junk food.)
Andrea: Here you go. (Puts everything on the counter.)
(The cashier is almost falling off her seat.)
Cashier: O O Ok, um uh the uh total is uh, 37.97, wait I mean 42.50.
Wait...
(Jim gives her a 50.)
Jim: Keep the change.
(Cashier almost faints.)
Sharon: Oooh... *sarcasm*
(They all walk out, Sharon putting the cap back on Andy's head. As
they drive off, the stock boy walks out from the aisles, white as a ghost,
and stares with disbelief. Then says...)
Stock boy: Whoa.
